If you don't buy this you're literally human shit

STOP thumb sucking, in the name of democracy!
Stop it now! But now NOW! 

PREVENT your bebé from such a hideous habit, buy now, don't be a moron,  HA HA HA HA HA HA!

Or what do you want? A future adult sucking his thumb during formal job interviews and sober agapes of import, like a nincompoop?

Save your baby from a future adult life full of ridicule, contempt and derision, you're the father or what you is, a fucking charlie? GO AND BUY DESPERATELY NOW THE... "Baby Alice Thumb Guard", don't be a galoot.








*Disclaimer and legal whatnots:
"Baby Alice Thumb Guard" is marketed by Guard MFcK. Co, 1.976.000 West Street, Cincinnatti, Ohio, all rights reserved (patent pending) so don't do even try to plagiarize or do anything stupid because we know where you live.
The amount of plutonium and arsenic in this item rises to 65% only, therefore its poisoning capability is almost laughable. 
Guard MFcK. Co is not responsible for any eventual incident, injury, illness or decease caused by incorrect manipulation of this product.